Ok, so after reading some reviews online, I chose a new obgyn to go to for that fun yearly exam. There's nothing major to it, but who looks forward to these visits?! I completed the 4 page medical history and even made a copy of my most recent blood work done earlier this month from my endo--- quite proactive, I thought. The office staff was really nice and all seemed well.
I met with the doctor who was nice, somewhat quiet and reserved. She looked over my bloodwork and asked questions-- who was my endo? What was I here to see her for other than a yearly exam? and so on. When I mentioned my endo doctor's name, I noticed a slight side glance that I didn't really pay attention to until I was rethinking the whole appointment. So, we're in the middle of the exam and she asked me how many pregnancies I had-- one. She asked what "barrier method" we were using to prevent more pregnancies and I said bc, but I wanted to talk to her about the difference between name brand and generic since I had been using generic. She didn't even respond..... her first response was "I don't like subscribing bc for my diabetic patients." This caught me a little off gaurd.... especially since I've had doctors affiliated with Georgetown University and Stanford University and they've always known ALL medications I've been on.
So, she went on to say "I assume that you won't have any more children and I think the best option for you is sterilization." Ok, I'm not exaggerating and she used THAT word, NOT "tubal ligation". And, what's up with her assumption-- thanks for asking!!!! I was dumbfounded. She went on to tell me to google statistics about bc and cholesterol and diabetes and that I'd see that it isn't good for me. She then suggested that my husband have a vasectomy and, the third option, was to use a non-hormonal IUD. She again reiterated that sterilization would solve any issues. I told her that when I switched all my prescriptions over to mail order, my endo wrote them out (since everything is diabetes related except for bc)-- my endo is qualified for reproductive endocrinology, so she can prescribe bc. She did me the favor of writing all the meds together to submit to insurance. This doctor made a face after I told her that my endo knew I was on them because she prescribed them. She said she wanted me to go home and research bc and diabetes and if I came back and told her that I wanted the bc, then she'd consider it.
I left this office stunned. Going in for a yearly exam and coming out with the recommendation to be "sterilized"--- not a fun morning. I called my husband and broke down and cried. I tried to keep an open mind with her 'concern' and googled the information---- yes, there are risks to bc for everyone, but my docs regularly test and review my blood work and monitor all things. Ironically, my endo called me that night on my cell phone about my on-going issues with insurance and the Omnipod. I replayed the conversation for my endo and she couldn't believe the doc used the word 'sterilization' and reassured me she meant tubal ligation. She also said that IUD's run the risk of infection so it is just as much a calculated risk as bc. She reassured me that I don't have to change my current medications unless I want to.
So, here are my thoughts: the doctor made an assumption that I would not have any more children without even asking my plans. The doctor showed obvious dislike for my current endo. The doctor made it blatantly clear that the "best" option for me was to gaurantee I'd permanently prevent myself from passing on my genes. I'm thinking that maybe she has some strong feelings about eugenics and passing on what she deems as insufficient genetics. I'm also thinking that maybe there's some cultural differences since she and my endo are from countries in the Middle East that haven't always gotten along. Her method of discussing options was quite offensive, too---- start with the most dramatic options before moving back to more reasonable alternatives.
All I have to say is that I wouldn't want anyone else to suffer through the humiliation and shame she made me feel in going in for a simple yearly appointment. Still haven't quite decided it this warrants a complaint to the medical board...........
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4 comments:
hmmm ..... well, I'm not quite sure she fully crossed any lines. BUT, in MY opinion, what she did express/show/say WAS inappropriate and unprofessional, that for sure!
Physically showing her dislike for your other doctor, questioning your other doctors methods, etc. in the manner in which she did [which sounds like it's based on prejudices, not on any real and binding fact], using words like "sterilization", was on the harsh side of things [Hello McFly, this is the 2007, not 1947, we don't call it that anymore].
It's one thing to be concerned for a patients health, but how she put things to you, doesn't seem like that's the case. She's all up on this IUD thing. Sounds a bit to me like maybe she's pushing for that [drug rep pushers], if you or your hubby aren't agreeable to being "sterilized".
Yea, the whole thing would have my red flags a-flyin!!
I certainly would be changing docs ASAP!! Is she in a private practice, or with a group practice? If a group practice, maybe you could file some sort of complaint with the group? If she's private practice, I don't know who you might make a complaint with, other than the medical board. I don't think they'd consider what she did medically inept though, she's just a tad on the unethical/unmoral and inappropriate side of things.
I do understand your frustration of being told to stop taking your BC. I went thru this way back in 1993, because I had then tested "borderline" Diabetic.
I did NOT want anymore kids, I already had 3, but I didn't have insurance, and was going through the local clinic for my BC and those wonderful yearly checkups.
So to prevent any pregnancy, until I COULD get my tubaligation, I was taking BC.
I informed her that I had NO desire to become pregnant EVER again, this baby factory has closed her doors for GOOD! And, well, I'm fertile Myrtle, dude looks at me crooked and I get pregnant!
I was also advised by my doctors and nurses to NOT have anymore children, since I did have Gestational D with my last one, that that the next one would most probably be MUCH worse, on BOTH me and a baby.
She goes on to tell me, well, if you continue to take the BC you will most probably push yourself into "full blown" Diabetes.
I told her, that I really didn't care, I was going to have it eventually anyway, with my family history of it. Besides, I'd rather be Diabetic than have another child!! I don't like being pregnant, each one was harder on me than the previous one. Besides that, I never wanted to have any more than THREE children. I've got them. I'm happy now! TYVM!
I FINALLY got her to see MY point of view on the whole issue, but then she insisted that I change the pills I'd been taking for a total of 8 years by then, to some lower dose ones. The one's she suggested are ones I'd taken when I first went on BC way back in 1984, and they did NOT work for me, and one that my sister had taken and become pregnant while taking them. I refused. She FINALLY said, Ok, well then, I'm only giving you a 6 month supply. You'll have to come back then and be checked out. I was like, fine, whatever, just gimme the BC lady!! sheeeeeeeesh.
Luckily, I got insurance a couple months later and had my tubal a couple months after that. And yes, I STILL got Diabetes later on, just as I told her I would. Though if that all happened in today's world, I would have been diagnosed Diabetic right then and there! So technically, I was already Diabetic! HU! ;0)
Good Luck! Hopefully there'll be more to comment and possibly give you some other suggestions!
If possible, switch doctors, and if she asks why be honest. I was stunned that any doctor would tell you to base your medical decisions on Google!
Whew I'm stunned and I offer my *cyber hugs* no doctor should talk to any patient like that! I mean c'mon didn't they take like a customer readiness class or something during their 14 years (or however long) of college??? But I would say never ever ever go and give her practice money again* Maybe she'd be better suited to practice in her native country, where it's 'normal' to use the term sterilization????
OMG, you have only one choice here: dump this doctor! There's nothing to discuss (other than your disgust!), as this person obviously has very condescending views and little can be done to change that. Its not worth the effort, but I would file a complaint with the local medical board!
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